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Throughout the years that I have worked with grieving people, I have often been asked...

How can you stand to do this...?
How can I learn to do this?

I originally wrote Helping Grieving People - When tears are not enough for pastoral counseling students in my Loss and Bereavement class as well as for psychiatric residents, in order to answer the two questions above. To put it briefly, when we know what to expect and how to help, we do not feel so helpless. When we can be fully present and handle our own unfinished business, we can be more available to clients.

Helping Grieving People - When tears are not enough:, provides three critical considerations - awareness of provider grief; understanding of the human grief response; and skills for intervention - for those who wish to do this work. The newly revised edition is not only a practitioner's handbook but also serves as a curriculum for academic instructors and staff-development trainers.

Please read my explanation of "Cowbells" to know my story, and please review "The Thirteen Helping Guidelines" and "The Seven Principles of Grief" to know how to help those who are grieving.

When you do read my book, if you have any "aha moments" please e-mail them to me along with comments on how the book helped you and, any suggestions for improvement. I will respond to all e-mails.

I continue to serve as a grief therapist because I know the positive impact it has and the difference it can make for grieving people. The need for others to carry on this work is crucial.

Please join me.

Shep Jeffreys

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ADEC Handouts

The Exquisite Witness.doc ( Click Here )

Exquisite Witness Defined.doc ( Click Here )

ExqWitness as Care Prov.doc ( Click Here )

Past Loss Survey.doc ( Click Here )

OlderAgeGrief.doc ( Click Here )

Denial.doc ( Click Here )

Intentional Avoidance.doc ( Click Here )

What Not To Say or Do.doc ( Click Here )

General Bibliography
Loss/Bereavement ( Click Here )

ADEC 2011
Contact ADEC 2011 Poster Sessions
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"Dr. Jeffreys presents a clear understanding of the nature of grief based on empirically supported models ..."
- Ira Byock, MD, Director, Palliative Care
Service, Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center,
New Hampshire

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"This edition is even better and more complete than the original."
-  Rabbi Harold Kushner, Author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People
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“This second edition of Jeffreys’ best-seller
offers grief professionals a helpful handbook …”

- Robert Neimeyer, PhD, Series Editor
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“Making an excellent book even better, Jeffreys' updated edition richly integrates professional and personal information…
A superb resource!”

- Therese A. Rando, PhD, BCETS, BCBT, The Institute for the Study and Treatment of Loss, Author, Complicated Mourning
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“Shep Jeffreys provides a great tool for clinicians and a gift for individuals struggling with loss.”

- Kenneth J. Doka, PhD, Professor, The
College of New Rochelle; Senior Consultant,
The Hospice Foundation of America

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“What makes this book unique is how Dr. Jeffreys blends his own experiences with
the loss of his son into the fabric of
what is a most useful book. I highly recommend it.”

- William Worden, PhD, Author, Grief
Counseling and Grief Therapy

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“Shep Jeffreys models admirably his own
ideal as an ‘exquisite witness care provider’
for grieving people…”

- Thomas Attig, PhD, Past President, Association
for Death Education and Counseling

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“This is a wise, helpful, accessible book… an invaluable foundation for beginners at helping the bereaved, and there are also many riches for experienced helpers.”

- Paul C. Rosenblatt, PhD, Professor of Family Social Science, The University of Minnesota
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“Shep Jeffreys has presented a clear and unmistakably informative resource for any
caring adult working with the grieving population. I highly recommend it for any professional, friend, or family member…"

- Linda Goldman, MS, LCPC, FT,
Private Practice, Chevy Chase, MD

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“The additional research adds greater breadth and depth to an array of outstanding clinical and pastoral resources …a valuable clinical and pastoral reference.”
- Rev. C. Kevin Gillespie, SJ, PhD, Associate
Professor, Loyola University of Chicago's
Institute of Pastoral Studies

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“In Helping Grieving People, Jeffreys artfully combines theory and research with clinical and personal experience…”
- Carol Wogrin, PsyD, RN, Director, National Center for Death Education, Mount Ida College
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“... For someone new to this field and for those who have “heard it all,” Jeffreys offers a page-turner and a book that you will dog-ear.”
- Harold Ivan Smith, DMin, FT, Author,

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